I’m Mike Farrar.
I’m a builder by trade, a writer by calling, and a man who has had to learn the hard way that survival and healing are not the same thing.
For a long time, my life looked functional on the outside. I could work, produce, lead, and keep moving. But underneath that, I was fighting battles I did not fully understand yet, mental health struggles, internal chaos, addiction cycles, and a mind that did not know how to slow down.
There was a season of my life where I was drinking myself to death.
My drug of choice was vodka, and at my worst I was consuming amounts that should have killed me. I ended up in the hospital with internal bleeding and ulcers, more than once. Looking back, I can say plainly: I have cheated death more than once.
And I do not say that for drama.
I say it because it is part of my story.
And because I know what it feels like to be trapped in cycles you cannot explain, carrying shame, trying to white-knuckle your way out, and wondering why sheer effort is not enough.
What Changed
People call it Recovery, I call it remission, and it changed my life, but not overnight and not in a neat, clean way.
It took time. It took failure. It took humility. It took truth.
And more than anything, it took God.
My faith in Jesus is not a side note in my story, it is the center of it. I am still here by the grace of God. He met me in places I should not have survived, and He has continued to reshape my life, my heart, and my direction.
Over time, I began to understand that a lot of what I was fighting was deeper than what I could see on the surface. I started to see how mental health, addiction, behavior, pressure, nervous system patterns, and spiritual life all overlap in ways most people do not talk about clearly.
That is a big part of why Regulate exists.
Why I Write
I write for the person who looks “fine” on the outside but feels like they are fighting a war inside.
I write for people in recovery.
For people dealing with mental health struggles.
For people carrying shame.
For people trying to make sense of their own patterns.
For people who love God but still wrestle with chaos in their mind.
I also write for the people who support them, family, friends, leaders, and anyone trying to understand what someone else may be walking through.
A lot of what I share comes from lived experience:
addiction and remission
mental health struggles
faith and surrender
pressure, performance, and burnout
learning how to heal for real, not just cope better
I am not writing as a doctor or therapist.
I write as someone who has lived it, survived it, and is still learning.
Why Regulate
Regulate brings that heart into a nine-week Christian discipleship journey. Through Scripture, weekly teaching, and daily reflection, it invites people to examine what is shaping their lives and deepen their relationship with the Lord.
It welcomes individuals, churches, and small groups, with a particular heart for military ministry and prison ministry.
A Work in Progress
I don’t write from a place of having it all figured out. I write from a place of growth, honesty, and grace.
I’m still learning. Still healing. Still being refined. Still walking with God one step at a time.
If any part of my story helps you feel seen, ask better questions, or hold onto hope a little longer, then this work is worth it.
Thanks for being here.
Grateful — Mike Farrar